TUMBLER RIDGE, BC – Feb 11, 2026
Mass shooting in Tumbler Ridge, BC: 10 dead, including suspect. Videos with titles like this flooded my newsfeed as soon as I hit search. This is not America. This is Canada. I thought this country is safe from guns and bullets. Or is it not? Many families in this neighborhood are going to sleep without their loved ones tonight, for the second night. Mark Carney’s speech gathered applause in the House of Commons. It’s a 7-minute speech I have yet to watch. Pierre Poilievre’s, leader of the opposition, delivered his remarks centered on national mourning—no partisanship remarks as the country grieves for the death of their children and loved ones. His speech—solemn, empathetic, emotional—a tone much needed during this time of grieving…
VANCOUVER, BC – Feb 10, 2026
My husband picked up our youngest child, 11 years old, from school. On the way, she narrated what happened in school to my husband, her Papa. As soon as she arrived home, she immediately entered my room without any hint of hesitation in sharing what she experienced at the playground today. This child is almost not hiding anything from us. Unashamed to express her feelings, often, without filter. As soon as she finished her story, I asked her questions. Not pleased about the antagonist in the story, I said “I’ll talk to your teacher tomorrow. This needs to be reported.”
Feb 11, 2026
As soon as my class finished, the thought of going to my daughter’s school surfaced in my heart again. It’s an incident I can choose to ignore today because things might be fine for my daughter anyway, or an incident I need to report to let the teacher know I’m aware of it, eager to know what actions they’ll take. My child needs me. What’s the point of being a mother if I’ll ignore this?
In her school, I saw the familiar faces of my daughter’s close friends who joined us on her birthday recently. After a few minutes, my daughter appeared with my husband who picked her up at the playground—and she’s eager to go home. I mentioned that I’ll talk to her teacher. She said there’s really no point because the other teacher had spoken with them. I reasoned, “It’s necessary for me to speak with your adviser.” It’s a need, not a want.
After a few minutes, we caught Ms. Lady in another room arranging a pile of books on the shelves. With a friendly demeanor, she stood up, faced us, and we asked if she received my email and if we could speak with her. We moved into their classroom together with my husband and my 11-year-old daughter. We sat down and started our conversation.
With gentleness and calmness, I started to talk to her. “My daughter reported to me yesterday what happened at the playground. She’s hesitant to let us speak to you about it but I believe it’s a matter that we need to discuss.”
A puzzled look appeared on her face, and I turned to my child because she’s part of this meeting. I told her, “Please correct me if there’s any mistake in my narration to Ms. Lady, ok?” My child nodded.
“When she was playing with her friends, she got into a fight with a schoolmate who’s shorter than her. This girl was cursing her and her friends, grabbed the notch of my child’s jacket, twisted it, and continued cursing her with ‘btch’ and ‘fck.’ My child did not fight back. She told me she’s afraid to be called a bad girl if she did.” I uttered a deep sigh in the end, hoping in my heart that she should’ve at least defended herself at the moment when someone grabbed her notch and cursed her. But she froze. Not because she’s afraid of this girl, but because she doesn’t really get into fights. She’s not trained to do it. It’s not part of her system.
“This is the first time I heard this. This incident never reached me,” said Ms. Lady. I thought she knew. She hadn’t read my email because I only sent it this morning and I did not relay the details of the incident. I only requested a possibility for us to talk in the afternoon after my daughter’s class. She said she hadn’t checked her email yet. I turned to my daughter and asked her to continue.
In an accent now culturally influenced by Canadians, different from the way my daughter delivers to us every day, she continued the story—showing her innocent eyes, her spontaneity in her speech, her confidence that we’re here. She relayed that it was reported to a playground supervisor who was present at the scene, but the news didn’t reach Ms. Lady. I felt bad it didn’t reach Ms. Lady. So, if I didn’t go to school today, it wouldn’t reach her because the supervisor may have perhaps ignored it and didn’t recognize the urgency of the situation.
Ms. Lady was empathetic and curious. She said that aggression of different layers, such as physical and verbal, is not tolerated in this school. Then, she asked my daughter how the fight transpired before the girl started to twist her lapel.
My daughter answered, “We were at the playground, playing as a team, when Sheelia had to be out from our team, but she didn’t want. That’s when she began cursing at my friend. I asked her why she’s saying bad words, and that she shouldn’t fight Vynia. That’s when Sheelia turned to me, grabbed and twisted my lapel, and continued cursing and saying B and F words.”
“So you’re only standing up for your friend,” continued Ms. Lady.
My daughter is a natural defender. When she witnesses any injustices or unfair scene encountered by her girlfriends, it’s just natural for her to stand up for them and not leave them alone in the air.
Ms. Lady was attentive. She listened and asked questions. She reassured us that she’ll check with the playground supervisor to get more information and will take necessary actions.
Before our conversation ended, I looked at Ms. Lady’s eyes, and asked, “When you get all the information and find whether Sheelia is at fault, I believe it’s important that her parents be also made aware of their child’s behavior and conduct.” I will not take this lightly.
Our conversation encompassed empathy, concern, respect, honesty, tuning in, active listening, sensitivity, neutrality, and trust. We trust that something will be done while it’s early because aggression can escalate when not treated early.
REFLECTION
Children need to be taught good sport. Winning is not the only name of the game. It’s also good attitude and acceptance of loss. That’s what being a good sport is all about. Early signs of aggression, when not given attention to, can develop into harsher forms of aggression. Some forms may develop further into goals of not only hurting others but also terminating lives. Behavior and conduct such as this could start early in childhood, often in the home. A child who witnesses cursing and physical violence may copy the same conduct toward others. Model and sources could be movies, TV watched on screen, anything heard or seen in their environment.
They say a child might be good at home, showing no signs of aggression, but transforms into a beast outside home, without parents knowing it. This is why, as parents, it is our responsibility to engage with our kids daily. It is our responsibility not only to provide for them but to develop a relationship so that we know what’s going on in their school, their relationship with their classmates, teachers, and friends. It’s our role, as parents, to guide and discipline our children—not when they’ve turned teenagers or adults, but as early as their toddler years.
“Foolishness is bound in the heart of a child” (Proverbs 22:15). If we don’t discipline our kids now, then who will now? If we don’t now, who will in the future? Government?
The fatal behavior conducted in Tumbler Ridge is a form of violence where many lives have been shattered. Many families couldn’t sleep—mourning, heart-broken, angered, burdened, shattered. Do we know what’s going on with our kids, or are we too focused on our career, achievements, and goals in life apart from them?
I look forward to a continued discussion with Ms. Lady, and trust that no further incidents involving the same girl will arise later with my daughter—or any children on the campus.
When people stop talking, violence could happen. “What we as a culture have to get back to is being able to have reasonable disagreement where violence is not an option.” (Charlie Kirk)
UPDATE – One Week After
After a few days of getting it reported, the Principal and teachers took action. They spoke with Sheelia without threat, and asked her to apologize to my youngest daughter and to never behave that way again. In return, my daughter forgave her and accepted her apology.
NOTE: Some names have been changed to protect their identity…es.